She was slimmer, younger and therefore hotter than this. But it’s the right type of face.

After an action-packed week of debauchery in Moscow I decided to go to St. Petersburg to see a couple of old flames and allow my liver some recovery time. Whilst there I removed one girl from my marriage list, moved another up the pecking order, almost had a same day lay with a new girl and hung out with a couple of old wings. Upon leaving Saint Petersburg all symptoms of gout and diabetes were on the wane, I had a few good night’s sleep under my belt, and I was refreshed and eager to get back to Moscow. I touched down at around 5pm, was in my apartment by 6pm and on the streets by 6.30pm.

As I left the flat, I got a message from Seven asking if I wanted to join him and Mr White for dinner. All I wanted to do was sets, but I did need to eat. “Ok, I’ll see you boys there” I replied. I made my way down Tverskaya towards Kamergirsky and spotted a huge IOI off a cute little thing in a pink dress. I opened, she eye spazzed hard and clearly liked me. I went for the idate – boyfriend. I told her that it was nice to meet her and she asked for my Instagram as I said goodbye. Interested, but not available.

I moseyed further on down Tverskaya and stopped to take a picture for my Instagram story. The main purpose of this was to let my flakey Moscow leads know that I was back in town. As I was doing so, a short girl with long black hair down past her ass, a white baggy t-shirt, baggy denim jeans and trainers passed me from behind. I finished taking the picture and decided to follow up on her to see what her face looked like. It was very nice indeed – tanned skin, high cheekbones and big pink lips, BUT she had an Asian face. I took a closer look, there was no way she was Chinese, this girl was hot.

I opened and she was on guard straight away, I can’t remember much of what I said but I remember her vibe. She studied me up and down as if she was trying to decide if she could be bothered speaking to me.

“You’re very cute, but you don’t look Russian… Maybe Khazakh?”

“I’m Russian!”

“Ah ok, maybe your genetics come from somewhere else.”

“No, I’m Russian! I’m from Yakutia!”

“OK, OK, don’t hurt me.”

She smiled and dropped her guard a little. It started to rain so I moved her a few metres away to some shelter and carried on with the set. I found out she was a student of finance and was on her way home when I opened her. As the set went on, she apologised for being grumpy at first, guys talk to her in the street all the time and they’re usually creepy.

“Come on, it’s 7pm, it’s raining, let’s get out of the rain and get a quick a drink.”


“There’s lots of places on this street.”

“Ooooh K.”

I walked her to the first bar I saw, and we sat down opposite each other. As we sat Sasha told me that she didn’t drink alcohol, she ordered an orange juice and I got myself a glass of red wine. We went through the comfort fluff and then came the shit tests…

“You must do this to all the girls, this happens a lot, but I never go for a drink with guys I meet on the street”

“When I’m in Moscow I talk to 700 girls a day, when I’m in London I only do a hundred. Most English girls are ugly.“ I generally give ridiculous answers to shit tests.

She laughed and asked me more about English girls, Sasha was opening up and telling me all about her recent holiday to Dubai where she partied and drank wine every day and how she was now on a detox.

“Aaaaah so you do drink!” Her armour was cracking.

“Yes, but I’m in recovery mode.”

“Well I think this meeting is a worthy exception, I mean it’s not every day you meet a handsome, charming, funny AND modest Irish man.”

I waved the waiter over and ordered two glasses of wine this time. Sahsa looked at me, rolled her eyes and then bit her lip. I had her.

I made it clear at this point, if she hadn’t realised already, that she was on a date. I asked her if she’d ever dated an Irish man, she hadn’t. I asked if her if I was the oldest man she’d ever been on a date with, I was – Sasha had just turned 21.

She drank her wine quickly and puffed away on IQOS cigarettes as I puffed away on my vape. As we got to the end of our drinks, I suggested we go for a walk and find some real cigarettes. She liked this idea.

We started walking in the direction of my apartment stopping off to buy cigarettes on the way. We went to a bar opposite my apartment, it had a very studenty vibe about it, there were kids everywhere with laptops and it was brightly lit – not the best seduction venue. We had one quick drink at the bar before Sasha asked if we could go out for a cigarette.  After the cigarette she came into me for a hug, at this point I tilted her head up and kissed her. No resistance.

I suggested we go somewhere else as the student bar was terrible, she agreed. I walked us straight to my front door which was one block away. She was reluctant at first so I used the same line I use on every girl “Just come in for a little while, you can leave if you feel uncomfortable”.

Up she came, taking off her shoes on entry. I showed her around my swanky apartment and poured some wine. We sat in the kitchen chatting for about 20 minutes before I moved her to the bedroom. There was a study desk where I had put my laptop, I sat her on top of me on the chair and asked her to play some of her favourite Russian music on youtube. Sasha obliged and played some weird Russian hip hop asking me if I liked it…

“It’s truly awful, I can’t believe you’re making me listen to this” I find being honest with them usually works best.

“hahaha, come on, it’s good, you just need to broaden your horizons, old man!”

Sasha was bobbing her head along to the music and translating every other sentence. Unpredictably, the rap music was all about bitches and hoes.

After around 10 minutes of torture, Sasha turned on the chair and kissed me. Things got quite heated, so I picked her up and moved her to the bed.

“No sex, no sex, OK?”

“OK, no sex”

We rolled around on the bed but every time I tried to remove her clothing, she pushed me away. I rolled off and we drank more wine. Sasha asked if we could smoke out of my bedroom window, I wasn’t sure as I had only checked in around an hour before I met her.

“Fuck it, let’s do it” I declared.

I opened the huge bay windows and we hung out the window overlooking the city as dusk turned to night. As we finished the cigarettes someone on the balcony opposite started flashing a torch at us, which I assumed meant that we couldn’t smoke there. This was a perfect excuse to return to the bed.

The LMR carried on for around two hours, but eventually I got her almost naked, down to her underwear. I was on top of her on the bed, slid her underwear to the side and tried to slide in raw dog. She pushed my hips away and shouted.



“Preservative!” As she pointed at my penis…

“Oooooh, you mean a condom?”

I reached for a condom in the drawer, tore it open with my teeth and slid it on with my left hand whilst my right arm was still under her back…

“Wow, you’re a pro at this”

“ssssshh” I told Sasha.

As I slide it in, she said “We’re drunk, right?”

That was the first time I ever had a girl rationalising sex as I slid my dick in…

“Yes, we’re drunk” said an almost sober me.

The sex was wild, she kept repeating “We are drunk right? You are a bad boy! I never do this. I haven’t had sex in 6 months” as she bit my neck and scratched my back with her nails.

I let Sasha stay over, I enjoyed hanging out with her and she was very good in bed. We went at it four or five times that night and then again in the morning before she left in a cab. Not much sleep was had, and I was dead the next day.

So, what did I learn from this experience? Nothing new. But here are the key points for the beginners;

  1. Spot the switch. I knew it was on by the way she looked at me when I ordered her a glass of wine in the first bar. The vibe completely changed at this point, her guard dropped, and I knew all I had to do was be patient. I probably missed out on so many lays by not spotting this in my early days.
  2. As with all SDL’s – Lead, lead, lead!
  3. Thank the daygame Gods for putting them in your path.

2 thoughts on “Lay Report: Always Have Preservatives

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