Lay Report: French Racoon

She looked like this, if a bit less slutty
This was not a daygame notch. It was my 6th “nightgame” notch of the year. When I say nightgame I mean I got half pissed and went over to talk to some girls in a bar. That’s 16 from daygame and 6 from nightgame in 2016 so far. Anyway, here’s the story…

It was the Eve of Donald Trumps spectacular win in the US election. I’d been out daygaming with Vaughn and it was what would turn out to a be a typical November session. No great shakes, I picked up a couple of numbers both of which have since flaked.

We decided to go for a few beers after the session and Rambo made a rare appearance to join us.

The three of us were sitting discussing how great it would be if Trump won, I don’t think any of us actually thought he would, the system wouldn’t let him. Anyway, this isn’t a political blog, I’ll leave that to the guys who know what they’re talking about.

As we sat there a fat, spectacled English girl was sat a table nearby us along with an Asian chode. She was clearly the alpha between the two, she was gloating about how she was a fantastic engineer who designed kids toys and how her little Asian man servant did everything for her, including going to the bar to get drinks in.

She kept chirping into our conversations and was shocked when we told her we were all Trump supporters. We calmly explained why and she couldn’t really explain why she was against him apart from Racism/Sexist blah blah. She was an idiot, but she kept offering to buy us rounds of shots which we dutifully accepted. All three of us proceeded to troll her for the rest of the evening without her ever really getting what was going on. It was fun.

The fatty and her Asian chode eventually departed and we walked around the bar opening a few more sets and not really getting anywhere.

Before we went to leave I opened a two-set sat nearby. I was a bit pissed by now so my recollection is a bit fuzzy. I remember talking to her and her friend, she was a brunette from France, she had big dark brown racoon eyes and  I teased her on this. Her friend was a short haired lesbian who seemed to be egging me on. I talked with the both of them for a few minutes before making my exit, it was a school night, getting quite late and I’d already had quite a bit to drink. I took the Raccoons number before I made my departure.

I was quite hungover the next day at work, but Trump had won so I didn’t care. I sent my pings to the two girls I closed from daygame (both replied before fizzling out) then I remembered I got another number in the bar. I looked her up on whatsapp and she didn’t have a profile picture, damnit! I couldn’t really remember what she looked like, but I thought to myself ‘if i chatted her up, she must be hot, right?’.

I sent the ping and she enthusiastically responded. I eventually got her out last night. I told her to meet me at Old Street station. I turned up, still unsure what she looked like. What’s the worst that can happen? My plan was to have one drink with her, if she wasn’t hot I’d make my excuses and leave.

I turned up at the station and she was there waiting, I instantly recognised her and to my relief she was actually quite hot. She was wearing tight jeans showing off quite a big juicy ass, a tight grey top accentuating her quite large breasts (at least D cups) and a long overcoat. She looked to be in her late 20’s and she was very bubbly. She was a low 7, if she was younger, she would be a high 7.

I bounced her to Grind which is a hipster coffee shop/bar in Old Street. We sat in the glass window on the stools and had one drink.  The conversation was already getting sexual and she was accepting all my “accidental” kino. I bounced her to another bar round corner and sat beside her on a couch. I kissed her and she didn’t seem to mind that we were in a busy place, kissing me with full tongue in front of everyone. It was on.

As we finished up the drinks I suggested we go back to mine and drink wine. She said she didn’t drink wine. OK, we can go to the shop and pick-up something else. We went to the shop and she got a few beers.

When we got back to my apartment I showed her around and we had a smoke on the balcony. As soon as the cigarettes were done she was all over me. I picked her up and took her to the bedroom and before long all our clothes were off and I was raw-dogging her. There was no massage pretence from me, no LMR from her, she’d come to fuck and it was all plain sailing from start to finish.

We fucked 4 or 5 times throughout the night, she was wild and clearly enjoyed fucking. It got to around 3am and she was insisting on getting a cab home, as she went to put her clothes on I could see both her ass cheeks were bruised quite badly. I didn’t realise I was spanking her that hard but she did not complain once. One thing that has genuinely surprised me as my notch count rises and rises is how dirty girls are willing to be in the bedroom, they all love to be dominated, except maybe my Serbian notch who overtly asked me to be more gentle.

I woke up the next morning to find my room in a mess, beer was spilled all over the floor and clothes were scattered everywhere. The racoon left a top and her jacket, so I’ll probably have to fuck her again. It’s a tough life.


Daygame Faggotry


Yesterday I put this tweet up;

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There’s a story behind it…

It was a wet, miserable international daygame day (Saturday), I’d been out drinking to excess the night before to celebrate Trump’s victory in the US election. I was hungover to the balls but I was still hungry, I was not for letting all the daytripping chodes get the girls. It was my 10th consecutive day on the streets chasing skirt but I wasn’t feeling the burn.

It was around 4pm and I had just arrived in central London after waking up late and having breakfast at lunch time. Rock star lifestyles.

I was with the Cheshire Gent (CG) who came down from Manchester to stay at my gaff for the weekend. We were walking down Cranbourn Street away from Leicester square. I’d just got off the phone with Xants who was regaling me with stories of how a French girl just opened and closed him as well as an idate he’d been on. Bastard.

I hung up the phone and waited to meet him outside the PUA Prett opposite the Spaghetti House.

I hadn’t done any sets yet and CG was babbling away about something… All of a sudden I felt very light headed and I started sweating profusely. I tapped him on the arm and said ‘I think I’m going to pass out’…

Next thing I know I’m on my back on a soaking wet Cranbourn street surrounded by about 10 people looking down on me in a circle. I could hear CG shouting;

‘Mate, maaate, are you fucking alright mate? you’ve just fucking passed out!’

It felt like I was under water trying to get to the surface. There was an old lady shouting things at me, I had no idea what was going on. CG with the help of some the onlookers picked me up and dragged me to a chair on one of the outside tables at Spaghetti house. I collapsed into the chair where apparently I passed out again. CG ran off to return with a can of coke, instructing me to drink it. I felt like I could barely pick the can up, it was very heavy. I slowly drank it and as I started to come to my senses I noticed that everyone was staring at me, spotlight effect times a thousand.

The coke did it’s job and I was starting to come around to my normal self. However, my head was throbbing, which probably had something to do with smacking it against the ground as I fell. CG filled me in on what happened. Apparently I collapsed onto him before hitting the ground face first. He immediately rolled me over onto my back and apparently I was out cold for almost a minute. Jesus.

Xants soon arrived on the scene… ‘what’s up you pansy?’ or something to that effect. I laughed, and said ‘nothing, i’m grand’. So he proceeded to tell me he had already got 3 numbers that day. Good for you man, good for you.

It was now around 5pm, I was weighing up the possibility of approaching some girls, but I had no energy. I also had a date with one of my regulars scheduled for 8pm, I hadn’t been laid in nearly two weeks so I was quite looking forward to seeing her.

CG recommended I go to the hospital for a check up as I had hit my head. Initially I was reluctant to do so, but I thought fuck it, I may as well be on the safe side.

We hailed a cab and CG accompanied me to a hospital near Warren Street station.

Once we got there I was seen to fairly quickly, well done NHS. I peed in a cup, gave them some blood and they did a heart scan. As I lay there waiting for the results I sent this to my concerned daygame brothers;

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I soon got a stream of concerned well wishes from my brothers in arms, here are some of them…

“What did you catch?”

“Soft jesse passed out”

“I wish he was in set, that would have been hilarious”

“Like I said, gay”

“Actually that gets official LAD status. So hungover he passed out but he still went out picking up chicks⁠⁠⁠⁠”

“Medical term for being a pussy”

“You’re probably riddled with stds”

These cheered me up a great deal as I waited and waited. But inside I was freaking the fuck out, that had never happened to me before and I have had plenty of nights of heavy drinking.

As I lay there I was thinking about how much worse it could have been, what if I was solo? what if I was crossing the road? what if I hit my head on a sharp object as I fell? What if I was in set?!

When the doctor eventually returned having examined the blood, urine and heart scan she told me everything was fine. If anything my heart rate was very low which she put down to me being physically fit. That was a surprise.

She proceeded to tell me that I was severely dehydrated from the drinking the night before and that my blood sugar levels were very low. Thinking about it, I hadn’t drunk any water that day, only 3 cups of black coffee and I hadn’t put any sugar in me.

So the message of this post is very simple. Do the basics right, drink water, keep your sugar levels up, get plenty of sleep etc. They are so simple that they should go without saying, however, as I have shown, they are easily overlooked. Believe it or not, there are some things which are more important than picking up girls.

Don’t be an idiot, like me.

Can you make her cum?


It’s a question I don’t hear often amongst the daygame fraternity, I can think of two reasons why;

  1. Most guys aren’t getting laid enough to worry about it – #playerproblems
  2. Most guys are too proud to admit that they aren’t a magician in the sack

Well I’m getting laid pretty regularly and I am not too proud to admit that I struggle to make them cum. If I look back on my lays this year, i’ve made maybe 3 out of 16 orgasm. My Turkmen who had never cum before in her life was adamant that I made her cum, but I don’t think I did because from my experience, their hole body normally vibrates uncontrollably.

I got another notch last night. It was a girl from a two-set I opened on a gutter game session with Xants on Saturday night. I opened (very rare for me to open two-sets), it was the Saturday before Halloween so all the girls were dressed up in slutty costumes. This particular two-set was little red-riding hood and an evil queen (I still don’t know what she was meant to be).

They both hooked pretty quickly, Xants did good wing man duties and spoke to red riding hood, I spoke to the evil queen. It was around 3am and all the bars were closed except casinos and night clubs. We bounced them to the Hippodrome after a couple of failed attempts to enter we eventually got in and had a couple of drinks. I got some kissing from the evil queen, red riding hood was having none of it and poor Xants didn’t get anywhere with her. It turned out red riding hood was staying at the evil queens place. She then proceeded to cock-block me and the evil queen saying that she wanted to go home. I took the evil queens number and off they went.

I invited the evil queen for a drink in my area last night. We did two venues then back to my place and it was easy sex. She is two years older than me so there wasn’t really any game involved. However, she had a great body, big tits, big ass and knew what she liked in the bedroom. This was a refreshing change as my 19 year old Russian that was staying with me for a week previously was the opposite in every way.

Getting back to the point of this post, I didn’t make the evil queen cum. She told me that she was very close and i just needed to keep going. This is often my problem.

My typical sex routine is as follows;

  1. Kissing
  2. Move to bedroom
  3. Massage
  4. Rub pussy over her jeans/pants/tights/whatever she’s wearing
  5. Remove jeans/pants/tights/whatever she’s wearing
  6. Finger
  7. Remove more clothes, hers and mine
  8. Go down on her for 5 to 10 minutes until she pulls my head up or I get bored
  9. Fuck her

I’m pretty sure I’m going wrong at step 8.

Xants once explained his method for making a woman cum quite graphically to me over a romantic candle lit dinner in a bustling London restaurant.

I’ve read several lay reports from the top PUAs, most recently Krausers in adventure sex book. He doesn’t stipulate if he’d made them cum and I’m not sure he even cares.

I care because when I fuck a 9, I’ll probably want to keep her around.

So daygame brothers, I am reaching out to you for your guaranteed pussy exploding sex methods. All thoughts and suggestions welcome in the comments section.