Lay Report: German Teacher


This lay was definitely the most LMR that I have ever encountered whilst still getting the lay.


I was coming towards the end of a post work daygame session on Friday and was walking towards a bar to meet my friends when I saw her. She was walking down Oxford street going nowhere quickly. I let her walk by so I could check out her ass, it was slightly bigger than what I would normally go for but I decided to open.

I told her she looked like she was daydreaming and she hooked straight away asking me lots of questions. I found out she was a 25 year old German (Turkish descent) teacher with an American accent. She had just arrived the day before and was only in London a few more nights. Even though I was on my way to meet friends I invited her for a quick drink, she declined as she was on her way home to get ready to go out with people from her hostel. She asked if we could meet the next night, Saturday, I said no because I was watching the FA Cup final and I had another date lined up afterwards (I didn’t tell her about the date). I tried to get her to ditch her hostel mates that night instead, she said she might, to text her and see.


I went on my way to meet my mates, I text her about meeting that evening but she said she was too tired, we re-arranged for Sunday. I wouldn’t normally push this hard but I knew she was leaving soon.

I went daygaming on Saturday and it was a pointless session, the weather was crap and there were rowdy drunken football fans (due to the FA Cup final) all over central London, I was not happy. I received a long apologetic cancellation message from an Iranian lead that I was due to go on a date with that evening. She was called into work and wouldn’t be able to make it.

I sacked off the daygame and went to a friends to watch the football. While I was there I text the German to see if she wanted to meet tonight (Saturday) instead. She agreed and met me that evening at Barbican tube station at 9pm.


I took her to the Old Red Cow first, it was pretty dead which was perfect for a first venue. I ran the usual comfort before bouncing her to a basement bar that I have been taking all my dates lately. The bar man in there knows me by name and must think I’m some sort of player, I’ve taken 5 different girls in there in the last two weeks, every time I go, he greets me by name and asks who the lovely lady is. Great social proof.

This bar closed and I told her I have some more wine back at home, she agreed to come back. When we left I took her for a walk towards a late shop to buy some water and cigarettes, we stood outside the shop having a cigarette and got talking about how her ex-boyfriend was crap in bed. She told me she liked rough sex, at this point I grabbed her around her throat, pushed her up against the wall and kissed her for the first time. She loved it and was kissing back passionately. I pulled away from her (always leave her wanting more) and grabbed her hand and started walking towards my place whilst talking reverting to boring chit chat.

We got to my front door, I said lets go up and she was more than happy to follow. I had tried this 4 times previously in the last couple of weeks and every girl said no, it was too soon.

When we got into my apartment I sat her down in the living room, poured us both some water and put some music on. I started kissing her then the first signs of LMR kicked in. She started saying that she wasn’t going to have sex with me and that I was only after one thing. All men are the same!

I said ok, let’s watch some shit youtube videos instead, I put on some Adrian Bliss videos to get her laughing. I started stroking her back whilst we were watching, then I stopped, she grabbed my hand and told me not to stop. I told her I’m much better at real massages. She said she’s good at receiving them. I grabbed the lap top, grabbed her hand and led her to my bed room. I told her to lye down face first on the bed, she obliged, I put the laptop on the pillow so that she could carry on watching youtube whilst I went to get some baby oil.

Before long she didn’t care about the youtube videos anymore as she getting quite into the massage, I told her “this is getting in the way” (her bra), I undid the fastening and carried on massaging. She kept telling me how good I was at it. I told her I’m better at massaging the front. She rolled over, I massaged her belly and tits for a little while before we started kissing again, she was very into it now, I started rubbing her pussy over the top of her jeans, she started gyrating so I went for glory, shoving my hand under her jeans and pants and started to finger her. She started moaning and was enjoying it for about a minute before pushing me off and telling me to stop. She was not going to have sex with me, she wasn’t that type of girl.

Fine, lets watch some more videos… It got to about 3am and she was starting to fall asleep on my bed. I woke her up and told her I was going to go to sleep, she asked if she could stay until the tube opened at 5am. I said sure, but I can’t sleep in my clothes so I stripped down to my boxers and got into bed. She went to the toilet, when she came back she took her jeans off leaving only a small top, bra and pants on before getting into bed. She lay on top of my chest, my hands started to wander and we started kissing again… This time I tried to go down on her and this point she told me “No, I can’t do this, not on the first date”. I said fine, rolled off and lay down again. She turned her back to me, I spooned. We both dozed off for a little while when I woke up to find that she was pushing her ass against my dick. I started fingering her from behind and kissing her on the neck at the same time. She started moaning and digging her nails into me, she was getting into it. I got a bit rougher and started biting her neck (I left a hicky on her neck, haven’t done that since I was about 16). I tried to go down on her again and once I got my tongue in there, there was no way back for her. We fucked for about an hour after this and it was more intense than normal as she had resisted for so long.


I didn’t ask her my usual question of when she knew she wanted to have sex as I could sense that she was disappointed in herself, I didn’t want to make her feel any more slutty. I actually felt bad a little! Instead I asked if she came, she said no, it’s impossible to make her cum. I need to up this part of my game!

Lay Report: Turkish Nymph


This one was especially sweet considering that she was resisting and giving me shit tests from the moment I opened her on the street, right the way through to the bedroom.


I saw a short brunette walking towards me down Market Street in Manchester. I forced an IOI, let her walk by so I could check out her ass. It was big and juicy with a tiny waist above it. I was gay if I didn’t open.

“Excuuuuuse me, it’s rude to stare and not say hello…”

She gives me a confused glare, I carry on.

“You do speak English right?”

She nods and signals, a little, I proceed…

“I think you look very cute, you seemed to be walking along in your own little bubble without a care in the world.”

Then came the barrage of shit tests.

“What do you want?”

“You can’t just talk to a girl on the street, this doesn’t happen in my country!”

“Do you do this to all the girls”

“You could be a murderer.”

I overcame all of them with a combination of ignoring them and turning it back on her. Eventually I got her laughing and into comfort.

I find out she’s Turkish, here to study and only arrived a few weeks ago and doesn’t really know anyone in Manchester. Perfect.

When I went for the close she said

“No, You are a womanizer”

I didn’t disagree.

“I’ll text you once, if you don’t reply, so be it” I said, with a cheeky grin.

I pinged her a couple of times over the last couple of weeks and set up the date for the next time I was back in Manchester.

Day 2

I was fifteen minutes late as I got stuck in the office. She arrived wearing tight blue jeans, a black leather jacket and she had put make-up on, no heel but she looked hot. When I closed her  I thought she was a 6.5, but now she looked a solid 7, maybe even a 7.5.

I walked her to the first bar (Affleck and Brown, in the Northern Quarter) where we sat at the bar. I did comfort for a while but she was still very sceptical and wanted to text her friends to let her know where she was. I told her that was rude, she was safe and if she didn’t feel safe she could leave whenever she wanted. She put her phone away. She told me a story where one of her chode boyfriends had planned to take a Chinese girl to the cinema that night, but this girl would only go with him if my date went with them. He told my date that she should cancel meeting me to tag along on his date to improve his chances with Chinese girl… I told her that her friend is a loser who can’t get a girl by his own means and that he was using her. She agreed and told me that she did not respect him. I feel sorry for him.

We walk to the next bar (Apotheca) where we sit beside each other on a couch. I escalate and try to kiss her. She pulls away. I tell her I will try a total of 5 times. She giggles. I did a bit more comfort and kino, giving her a shoulder massage, I tell her I’m an expert at massaging, I learnt everything I know from youtube. I go for 5th kiss attempt and she kisses me awkwardly.


We leave and I walk us in the direction of my place. She tells me she doesn’t like kissing in public and that she didn’t like kissing in the bar. I talk nonsense as we walk towards my apartment, it seems to do the job as she is not protesting. We get to my door and I say “come up for one more drink”. She agrees.

I show her around my apartment and pour us both some Baileys. We sit on the couch, I put some music on, we chat a little, have one sip of our drink each before we are kissing quite passionately.

I pick her up (she weighs about 45 kilos), walk her to my bedroom and throw her on the bed. We carry on kissing fully clothed and i rub her pussy over the top of her pants, I can feel that she is soaking wet. She pushes me off and says “I want to sleep, no more”. However, she proceeds to strip down to her underwear, she rolls over and pulls the covers over her head.

I get up, switch the light off and get undressed. I get in the bed and spoon her, she pushes her big ass in to my boner. Within seconds I’m inside her and she is wild!

My condom comes off half way through, and I raid my drawers, no more condoms… fuuuuck. She says, no problem and goes down on me to finish me off. What a nice girl.


I ask her when she knew she wanted to have sex with me, she says “when you started touching me in the second bar”. She proceeds to tell me that the reason she was so sceptical at the start is because she finds it difficult to find a man who will put up with her problem. Inside I’m thinking, shit, what problem?!

I ask her “what problem?”. She says “Once I start having sex, I never want to stop, I think I have a problem, and previous relationships have failed because of it”.

I tell her it’s natural but she disagrees.

We doze off and I wake at around 4am, she’s rubbing my dick. We start playing around again, before I know it we are fucking (bare back). This carries on for 3 hours before I get up, shower and go to work. Work was tough the next day, but it was worth it.

Turkish flag captured.

Abundance or a Purple Patch?


I had a good couple of sessions in the Sun over the weekend (spending some time with Xants). I agree that it’s better in the Sun, there are more women out, they’re wearing less clothes and the extra Vitamin D makes everyone happier. It’s the first time I felt “on” in a while. I got 11 numbers and 1 facebook from 28 approaches.  9 of those replied. I’ve since been on a date with one of those, I’ll do a separate post on her.

Good Vibrations


My phone has been vibrating quite a bit the past few days from those closes. It’s nothing to do with my text game, because I don’t have any. I believe it’s all in the quality of the set. I’ve re-watched all of my sets (recorded on my gum cam) and although they weren’t perfect, I managed to get through most of the model on each one.

Be a Seedy Bastard

I complimented, teased, challenged, built comfort, found out their logistics and tried to seed a day 2 (if the SDL wasn’t on) in each set. I think the last step makes the texting easier. E.g. with a Russian I teased that she probably just drinks vodka all the time to which she responded “No, I love red wine”… See example of shitty text game below… however, this chat ended up with us setting up a date for next week.


I went out on Monday after work in the rain with a big umbrella. In hindsight I should have went to Westfields, but I persisted in the rain. It was much harder to get girls to stop, the 3 that I did get to stop were in a massive hurry even if they were stood under my umbrella. I gave up after about 45 minutes.

SDL Fail

I did another session after work today and the first girl I opened at Piccadilly Circus hooked. She was a tiny Spanish 7 who had just finished her shift. We chatted for about 10 minutes before I enquired about her logistics. She told me she was about to go home to watch series, I told her I have a better idea. I took her for a drink. We walked to the bar, I said “I’ll get the drinks, it’s your job to find us a good seat”.  She got us a couch where there was only space to sit beside her… cha ching!

I started escalating straight away, I was using the usual gambits to touch her hands, legs, arms and got her to kiss my hand… we were about 20 minutes into the idate before I tried to kiss her. She pulled away and said “noooo, I don’t kiss strangers from the street”. I went back to comfort, suggested she buy me a drink at the next place. She said she had things to do at home. We finished our drinks, I tried to kiss her again and she turned her head and laughed. Things ended on good terms, I walked her to her tube, got her number and gave her a big hug before seeding the next date. She seems keen to come out again but I won’t be surprised if she gets buyers remorse. I’ve never tried to escalate that fast before.

Turkist Delight

I have day 2 set up for tomorrow night with a Turkish 7 that I closed a couple of weeks back. She was very very sceptical of my approach throughout the set, saying things like, this is weird, I don’t know you, you could be a murderer bla bla. But she’s coming out and I’ll run the model as per usual.

Abundance or a Purple Patch?

It’s both, from my experience, abundance it temporary unless you keep approaching. I haven’t been laid in a few weeks, but this is the first time in a while where I’m texting more girls than I have days free in the week to see them. I may have lots of phone numbers and they may be texting back, but as Torero and Krauser say, you can’t fuck a phone number, all you can do is keep shoving the numbers in the funnel and see what comes out.

April Review

Sessions: 12

Approaches: 83

Closes: 16

idates: 1

Dates: 2

Lays: 1

Not quite 200 lays from 200 approaches, but better than last month. I also had one near miss on a THIRD date with a girl who was on her period, I very kindly offered to lay a towel beneath her buttocks, I even had a red one, but she declined… I’ll give her one more go in May.

Obviously my target for the month was ridiculous, but my main idea was to get out a lot more. I averaged 3 times per week which isn’t bad considering work has been mental, i was ill for best part of a week and I made the big move daawn saaf.

I’m going to be more realistic this month. 4 sessions per week, 2 lays. Game on.